What really DID kill the cat?
• August 16, 2021
Curiosity is a Game Changer!
"Curiosity Killed the cat". Who hasn't heard this phrase at least a hundred times in their lifetime? Is this true? Did the cat die from curiosity? What does that even mean!!
Well, fyi .. curiosity did NOT kill the cat! That's just ridiculous. Curiosity is just an emotion and emotions don't kill. But it is a statement packed full of unconscious meaning. As a mindset coach, I pay attention to stuff like this. Of course the statement sounds innocent enough. What's the big deal? Right? Wrong! Let's unpack this a little. When someone says to someone else ... "just remember, curiosity killed the cat!" What they're really saying is that whenever you're curious and begin to explore, you're going to get hurt or worse, DIE! It also infers the idea that you should be ashamed for wanting to know something .. that you're being nosey or trying to learn something that is none of your business.
Let's explore what curiosity really is and why it can literally change your life and your relationship with yourself and others. The definition of curiosity is "a strong desire to know or learn something." As kids, we are curious about everything! If I had a nickel for every time one of my kids said "Why", I would have been able to retire early. When we're curious, we lean forward and open up to the mysteries of life. We allow our minds to receive information without judgment or bias. We just want to know all of the things! Can you imagine if you replaced judgment of others with curiosity? My clients hear me talk about this all of the time. How often do we judge someone's actions to be wrong or unacceptable?
"My kids should know better"
"My husband should take out the trash"
"You should/shouldn't wear a mask""She's so mean for not inviting me to go along"You get my drift .. all of these statements are just judgments of others. It's coming from a place that my way is right and yours is wrong, no matter what the reason. Listen. I totally understand that as human beings, we want to be right at all cost (even when at times we're wrong). In fact, we as Humans are most comfortable when the people around us are doing things or see things in the same way as we are. When we're comfortable, we feel safe. But curiosity is that playful emotion that let's us come into any conversation and open ourselves up to new points of view. It creates space to learn new things about someone .. even if you've known them all of life your life. Curiosity not only helps to open up conversations with others, it allows us to receive the information. I see couples completely change their relationships by allowing themselves to approach a conversation from a curious place rather than a place where they think they have all of the answers. Curiosity is light and playful. More importantly, it leaves room for compassion and understanding. No two people are going to think alike. Therefore, there is no way they can always agree. But each person has their reasons, thoughts and beliefs that have shaped the way they walk through life. Keep in mind, you may still find that you like your way better. But curiosity in a conversation will always keep the door open to the possibility of learning something new. You may not always agree with what someone says or does, but if you allow yourself to just wonder what moves them without judgment, it could literally change every relationship you have.Be curious about the world you live in and the people you inhabit it with. People really are quite fascinating!Make it a beautiful week and be curious! Life is full of magical moments if you're open to them.
This week I was reflecting on how self hate has almost become common place with people .. especially kids, which is heart breaking. We are born complete and whole. We don't have to do anything to earn Worthiness or Enoughness .. we just are. If you believe in a higher power, then you know there are no mistakes. Perhaps a divergent pattern that doesn't resemble the others, but just because it's not like the others doesn't make it wrong or defective. Every human being is an essential piece of the universal puzzle. Just take a moment, give yourself a little grace and know that when you constantly look at yourself with such a critical eye, that you're missing the intrinsic beauty of you just being you. I thought I'd share something that I wrote .. It's about seeing yourself for who you really are. Have a beautiful week and just be You . Remember, you were born whole, complete and enough. The Magic Wand From a distance I see you in the river of your tears Holding you under from the weight of your fears "I can't do this!" you scream into the night "There's nothing about me that ever seems right!" I hear your whispers swirling in your head The hurtful things that are constantly said If only a magic wand I had in my hand I'd touch your crown, and a new thought could land Suddenly your eyes wide open to what I can see The veil finally lifted, with certainty you'd agree Your inner beauty revealed so radiant, so true Completely washing all self doubt away from you The creative Genius that quietly lives within A new relationship would finally begin Now peer into the pool to see your reflection What is revealed is pure perfection Trust that you're here as your Maker intended All self judgment permanently suspended Have your own back whenever you fall Be your own best friend once and for all It's time to love all of you even when it's tough You're worthy and beautiful .. so completely enough! Until next week, sending so much love your way! xo Jeanna
This week I wanted to talk about how self limiting beliefs show up in our lives like sneaky little gremlins hiding in the closets of our minds. I think it's easy enough to identify the big mind monsters. You know .. anything that our Comparison Queen or King tells us, which always relates to the Lack of Enoughness category . "I'm not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, skinny enough" statements. Comparing yourself to others never leads to anything warm and fuzzy or a productive outcome. What I want to talk about are some of the sneakier things we come to believe that on the surface seem fairly harmless. These little gremlins are the thoughts we often accept as being true and unchangeable. The real truth is that these little sentences can deteriorate your confidence and self worth over time. Learning some new power thoughts will literally change the course and direction of your life! So, as you can imagine, I think today's topic can be a real game changer! Have you ever stopped to consider the only thing holding you back from achieving your dreams is YOU and your THOUGHTS?!? Not your education, status, gender, or any other reason you might be able to come up with. It's the relationship you have with YOU! As I've shared with you before, a thought is just a sentence in your head. It just starts out as a baby spark without much to it. The power of a thought is based on how often you think it. And if you've been following me, you already know we have A LOT of thoughts dancing around up there in our noodles. The adult mind has about 65,000 thoughts a day, so it's a pretty busy place. Imagine if we hear and then think just one of those thoughts over and over again? A thought like, "this is hard." Now keep in mind, it is normal for our minds to gravitate towards negative thinking. It's one of the ways we stay alert to danger. It becomes a problem when we turn that negative thinking against ourselves. Those thoughts actually becomes the enemy within holding us back and tripping us up along the way. Today, we're going to talk about how we become self limiting in the first place, the five gremlins we need to tame and the super thoughts we can use to move from paralysis and doubt to freedom and success. The first big question we need to explore is where do self limiting beliefs come from? It actually starts at a very young age. From the time we start to interact with other humans, we're interpreting the meaning of our world. Did you know that a toddler hears the words "no" or "can't" 3 times as often as "yes" or "you can"? Just by nature, our parents are limiting our actions and our natural desire to explore. Of course, it's coming from a good place. They want to make sure we don't get hurt or put our baby selves in a dangerous situation. As children, we rely on the people around us to guide us and keep us safe. How that message is delivered isn't always done in the most supportive or positive way. Over time, the messages we receive become an accepted way of thinking and believing. And for kids, the things their parents say become their truth. But a belief is just the story that we've accepted over time. You've heard it and thought it so often that it just becomes an automatic way of thinking. A belief is not a truth. It's simply a judgment about your world, how you're experiencing it and what you need to do to stay safe. If those beliefs or stories are never questioned, how would you know that the way you're thinking is limiting your ability to show up in your life? It's like having invisible handcuffs on. Before we can begin to change our limiting beliefs and manage our minds, we need to question the things we're telling ourselves. It takes self-awareness, effort and practice. But it can be done. Let's explore five self limiting thoughts you may tell yourself without realizing it. I also included some examples of the possible emotions that get we might feel when we're thinking these things. The little two word sentence, "I can't" or "you can't" is the #1 cause of killing dreams. Fear and anxiety are normal human emotions. What if we decided that we CAN even if we're scared. Below are 5 self limiting beliefs that get in our way of being the best version of ourselves. Begin to question your beliefs and thoughts to make room for better ones. Those uncomfortable thoughts create uncomfortable feelings, which is just energy and vibrations, bouncing around in our bodies. When you give yourself permission to feel uncomfortable, you will begin to set yourself free. 1. Thought: I can't Resulting Emotions: anxiety, fear 2. Thought: I should/shouldn't Resulting Emotions: shame, judgment 3. Thought: I have to Resulting Emotions: resentment, anger 4. Thought: I don't know Resulting Emotions: confusion, doubt 5. Thought: It's just the way I am Resulting Emotions: defeat, sadness Ask yourself, are some of these self limiting gremlins causing havoc and interfering with your ability to get out of your own way? It's important to understand that the way you think impacts the way you feel and drives your actions, or in many cases our inactions. You're limiting your ability to create the life you dream of. Below are some super thoughts that will always empower you to move forward, even if it feels uncomfortable or odd. 1. New thought: This is easy Resulting Emotions: confident, calm 2. New thought: God/universe is working for me Resulting Emotions: determined, motivated 3. New thought: I can do hard things Resulting Emotions: Fearless, Courageous 4. New thought: I choose to/I want to Resulting Emotions: Empowered, Excited 5. New thought: I trust Resulting Emotions: Trusting, Present I always tell my clients that thoughts are free. Choose the ones that help you to be who you want to be. My favorite thought is "I can do hard things." Life was never intended to be without its challenges. That's what makes being human so interesting! If you choose thoughts with intention and lean into them, you will be amazed at what you're able to accomplish! As always .. make it a beautiful week and thanks for tuning in. Next week I plan to talk about Self Loathing and when did this become so trendy and noble? Remember! What's possible starts with a single thought! So think beautiful good thoughts. Until next week, sending so much love your way! xo Jeanna
